Friday, 30 October 2009

Beautiful baby. I longed for you, ached for you.

I loved you from the minute I knew you were growing inside me. I didn't yet know who you were but you were my baby.

When you were born I was overwhelmed with love and wonder, and a deep, deep desire to protect you. No-one was meant to hurt you my child.

I failed, as every parent is bound to fail. We cannot keep you from sorrow or pain how ever hard we try.

You have been my life - my joy - my reason for living.

You are grown now my son. And it is I who has hurt you most. This was not my intention and it cuts me to the core to know that I have lost you.


  1. Plese forgive my self indulgence in posting this blog, it was written in a sad moment. It helped me to deal with feelings. Thank you.

  2. i know how you feel. It breaks your heart doesn't it? All i can say is it will pass, just hang on in there and eventually they will come back to you.

  3. You're in my thoughts and meditations.X

  4. Thank you Dixie.X And yes I hope they do come back to me, Miriam, one day. X

  5. Hi Julie,
    I know that you have been going through a difficult time in regards to your son.
    I know this will pass. My son was taken away from me. He was hardly part of my life for six years. Yet despite, the trials and tribulations and the occasional disagreement; he is back in my life. I send you positive blessings.
    With respect, Gary x

  6. Thank you Gary for your encouragement. I actually have two sons, and although this blog says "SON" it refers to both of them equally. You and my sister have been through this scenario and I am encouraged by the outcome of both your stories.
    Bless you. Julie. X

  7. Parenting is not a precise art, I know!
    If only they came out with instructions on the back, like a jar of Dolmio. But we do our best and that is all they ask of us.

    X X X